Tuesday 1 February 2011

TftW: A Blackadder Surprise

This is the newest episode o my TftW,   it features someone special and the second use of a Blackadder themed transformation, of someone into Edmund Blackadder.    I hope you enjoy reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it.

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It was a rather special evening in the Hanks household,  especially for James -  his daughter Mariana had just recieved some Yowies from trademe,  and she had planned something special as a way to thank him.  She knew what her father liked and what kind of sense of humor he had.

James had always been a British comedy fan,  and much like his daughter he was a fan of Rowan Atkinson,  his wife Jill had seen Rowan's live performances and both of them watched Blackadder when it first aired.  He hadn't heard much of Rowan's other works and disliked Mr Bean,  but he always adored the Blackadder series.

That evening while he was on his computer doing some buisness investments and checking his message,  a package arrived for him.

"Hmmm.... I wonder what it could be."   James thought.

He stopped what he was doing and decided to take a look at the package,  it was a fancy box with black and red material on it and a card with fancy old English writing on it.   He opened the package,  inside was a Blackadder fan's dream - a set of Blackadder figurines,  a copy of Blackadder: The Whole Damn Dynasty,  the Blackadder: Ultimate Edition remastered dvd set including Blackadder's Christmas Carol and Blackadder: The Cavalier Years,  a Blackadder inspired coat of arms which was signed by Rowan himself,  and a Blackadder graphic novel.

"These are wonderful.  I wonder who sent these."  James said to himself.

There was also something else in the package as well,  it was a mystery item and it seemed to be glowing -  he was about to take the item out to see what it was when black smoke came out of the package and begin to surround him as a familar song started playing.

"The sound of hoof beats across the glade.
Good folk, lock up your son and daughter.
Beware the deadly flashing blade.
Unless you want to end up shorter..."

As the smoke surrounded him,  he started changing -  first his clothes changed from modern clothes to 18th century attire -  black in colour - resembling a Blackadderian outfit and a black cape appeared,  he also grew taller and started becoming a lot more slender...

"Blackadder.. Blackadder
He rides a pitch black steed.
Blackadder,  Blackadder,  he's very bad indeed."

Slowly but surely he started to morph and resemble one of the many Edmund Blackadder incarnations,  his hair also turned from greyish white to black and grew into a similar style to one of the Blackadder incarnations.

"Black:  his gloves of finest mole.
Black:  his codpiece made of metal.
His horse is blacker than a vole.
His pot is blacker than his kettle."

His transformation progressed further as he morphed and started looking more and more like a Blackadder incarnation and less like himself,  his mind also began to change as his intelligence increased dramatically along with his wit,  his mind filled up with all sorts of historical Blackadderian knowledge of his ancestors and he became more cunning and crafty as his personality slowly became more Blackadder-like along with his voice starting to sound like Blackadder's voice and less like his own.

"Blackadder,  Blackadder.. with many a cunning plan.
Blackadder,  blackadder... you horrid little man."

As the song finished so did his transformation as his face finished morphing and now fully resembled Edmund Blackadder,  not only did he look like Blackadder, he also now had Blackadder's personality and his voice as well.   The smoke cleared up,  he went on over to the mirror and took a look -  not only did he look,  sound and act like Blackadder but he now WAS Blackadder.   He had been fully transformed into Edmund Blackadder.

"Well this is an interesting predicament."   James quipped in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

When his wife Jill came in to the study to see what was going on,  she didn't quite expect to see Edmund Blackadder standing there in the place of where her husband  was.

"Oh hello Mr Blackadder,  have you seen my husband anywhere?"  Jill inquired.

"I'd hate to be the one to tell you this... but I am your husband."  James responded in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"No it can't be.  You're way too smart and cunning to be my husband,  my husband James is a total goof off."  Jill murmured.

"You silly thing,  I am your husband James."  James told her in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"Really? You look and sound more like Blackadder to me."  Jill said, chuckling a little.

"Yes...really.  I've turned into Edmund Blackadder,  thanks to that mystery item in that package full of Blackadder stuff which is a dream come true for me."  James explained in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"I see.  Well I like it, it's a nice refreshing change from your usual goofy self."   Jill said, smiling.

Jill then walked out of the study and went back upstairs to the kitchen,  a portly owl-like monster then flew into the study.

"I see you have received the package that was sent earlier."   The owl-like creature cooed.

"Who are you?"  James/Blackadder asked,  in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"I am Chancellor of Blackbluedawg's monster gang.  And i'm here to transport you to someplace special."

"And where would that be?"  James/Blackadder inquired, in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"You'll see.."  Chancellor responded.

With that Chancellor flapped his wings,  breathed in and out and let out a gasp of magical breath -  before spinning around like a human hurricane and transporting him into a rather posh looking English castle hallway.

"Where are we?"  James/Blackadder inquired,  in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"That is an easy one,  we are in Blackadder Hall.   Home to the Blackadder family.  This is where your special surprise awaits."  Chancellor explained.

Chancellor then flew over to one of the doors with James/Blackadder following,  he then used his magical breath on the door to open it -  it looked rather dark and quiet,  that is until..

"Surprise!"  A group of people yelled out.

"Hit the lights Baldrick."   A woman instructed.

"Yes Miss H."  A male voice responded,  as he turned the lights on.

James/Blackadder turned around and saw that it was a party of sorts,  there were a rather distinguished group of guests at the table including a rather cheerful fellow who was a descendent of Prince George from Blackadder The Third,  and a short, smelly hairy man who was one of the newest members of the Baldrick family - he was even holding a basket with some turnips inside it.

"This party is for me?"  James/Blackadder exclaimed in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"Yes..."  A young woman responded.

The young woman stood up, it was his daughter Mariana -  decked out in Queenie inspired attire with a tiara on her head.

"Mariana? You put this whole party together?"  James/Blackadder quipped in Edmund Blackadder's voice.  "I must say i'm impressed."

"Why thank you father,  I also had a bit of help from Baldrick and George here - and from all my friends and Chancellor."   Mariana responded.  "Oh...and Rowan Atkinson of course."

"How did you pull it off?"  James/Blackadder asked in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"Well I knew you were a Blackadder fan like me,  so I told Chancellor who sent a message to Blackadder Hall -  the message was recieved by Baldrick and George - who then sent it to Rowan.  Rowan,  Baldrick,  and I along with Chancellor then thought of a cunning plan and made arrangements for a Blackadder themed celebration,  we chose Blackadder Hall here as it is the perfect place to have a Blackadder party,   Baldrick then helped write the invitations and Rowan and I helped with getting you the perfect present -  that package that arrived for you earlier was from me and him,  Rowan signed the Blackadder coat of arms,  I got the figures, the book and the dvd."   Mariana answered him.

"And what about the mystery item?"  James/Blackadder inquired in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"The mystery item was Rowan and Baldrick's idea."  Mariana replied.  "And it was all part of our little cunning plan."

"Well you did such a splendid job."  James/Blackadder responded in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"It is my little thank you gift to you.  Thank you for getting me the Yowies,  you're the best dad i could ever ask for."  Mariana said, smiling.

"You really think so?"  James/Blackadder inquired in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"Of course i do,  no matter what you do i will always love you."   Mariana responded.  "I think you are wonderful.  And you are even more wonderful now that you're Blackadder and all."

"I concur."  A rather intelligent English sounding voice added.

The person who said it stepped out of the shadows,  it was Rowan Atkinson himself  dressed in a rather elegant Blackadderian costume.

"Rowan? What are you doing here?"  James/Blackadder asked in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"I helped with organizing the celebration."  Mr Atkinson explained.  "Plus your daughter told me that you're a fan of mine."

"Why yes I am."  James/Blackadder responded in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"Well that is splendid.  And now that you've become my famous Blackadder character and everything,  i can share with you some of my secrets and maybe teach you how to be a proper Blackadder."  Mr Atkinson told him.

"Oh that would be fantastic."  James/Blackadder exclaimed in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

The party went on all through the night and all sorts of Blackadder inspired festivities took place,  including a special live performance by Chancellor and the crawlspace monster gang -  performing their own rendition of the Blackadder theme tune,  as well as a grand banquet and a ball -  and followed by a Blackadder marathon starting with the first series all the way to Blackadder Goes Forth and to Blackadder's Christmas Carol,  and Blackadder Back and Fourth and Blackadder: The Cavalier Years.  

When the party was almost through, all of the guests left except for James/Blackadder, Rowan Atkinson, Baldrick,  George,  Mariana,  Chancellor and the other monster gang members.  

"This party has been amazing.  Thank you everyone."  James/Blackadder acknowledged in Edmund Blackadder's voice.

"It's not over yet."  Mr Atkinson quipped.  "There's still more where that came from.  Isn't that right Baldrick?"

"That's right mi'lord."  Baldrick responded.

"Absolutely."  George added.

Mariana then went into the grand throne room along with Chancellor and the monster gang members,  while Rowan stayed with James/Blackadder,  Baldrick and George. 

Rowan started teaching James/Blackadder all about the history of the Blackadder family and James/Blackadder started learning to get in touch with his more Blackadderian nature.   Including how to treat Baldrick and how to use witty Blackadderian insults.

And when their lesson was through,  James/Blackadder was now a true Blackadder family member.   Rowan stood there with a look of satisfication on his face,  feeling extremely proud of him.  

As for James - oops I mean the new Blackadder,  he became Rowan's apprentice and learned to follow in the footsteps of the other Blackadder family members before him,  he also grew very much used to being Blackadder and he helped carry on the legacy of the Blackadder family.

Remember the best kind of prize is often a surprise,  especially if your loved one is a british comedy fan and loves Blackadder -  a Blackadder surprise is even better than a regular surprise in that case.

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