Jeff Goldblum factoids

Here are some factoids about Jeff Goldblum.

• He is a very talented actor.



• He is NOT dead.



• He is NOT watching anyone poop.



• He is NOT a drunk.



• He is very intelligent and his roles in movies like The Fly often show it.



• He played the part of Dracula in the goosebumps pc game Escape From Horrorland.



• He is the voice of Falco in the Millitary Koalas movie. Falco is the shapeshifter of the group.



• He has a restraining order on Doizee. Doizee thought The Fly was real and that he was a real human/fly hybrid and attemped to catch him and eat him.

• He's made appearances in at least 2 Doizee Club movies.

Now a lot of people tell me that I remind them of him, and it's true I am a lot like him- to be exact i'm like his character in The Fly except I haven't been turned into a mutant human/bug hybrid- my brother on the other hand has- we have a telepod just like the one from the movie- and me and my brother have both had our gene's splice with some other creature by accident- well I had mine accidentally fused with Chumsley the werejohncandy so I slowly underwent a metamorphosis into Chumsley (it was a nice form to visit, but I wouldn't want to live in it) while my brother ended up being fused with a fly like in the movie and ended up becoming this grotesque Brundlefly clone. My transformation into Chumsley wore off after a week- I discovered a way to reverse it- turning me back into my normal self, my brother's Brundlefly transformation however took a couple of months to wear off not to mention it was pretty gross, but in the end we managed to figure out a way to turn him back to normal. He still kept the superpowers though.

I went as Seth Brundle for halloween once, there was also a morph I did of me into him- I'll post that sometime.

Oddly enough, I had a couple of dreams that were just like The Fly. Here's what they were:

• The first one is where I get my dna merged with that of a panda and end up becoming this human/panda hybrid that is about the same size as John Candy.
• The second one is where I try fusing my dna with that of John Candy and end up becoming a Chumsley clone or a big guy with a lion's ears, a black nose, whiskers, a mane and a tail (kind of a feline version of John Candy's character from Spaceballs). Which are actually quite nice. Except sometimes if I get it wrong I either end up becoming some sort of undead ghoul or some sort of Frankenstenian creature.
• The third one is where I combine my dna with that of some Star Wars aliens. Some turn out pretty good like the Wookie one and the Ewok, but the hutt one doesn't turn out the way I planned. I would rather not describe how that one went.
• The fourth one involved my brother getting his dna fused with that of our friend Dan McCloud's pet lizard (his name is Charles) and becoming a human/reptile hybrid crimefigher named Reptillico.
• The fifth one involved me fusing with the neighbour's cat Lancealot and becoming a cat-person (half human half feline) which kind of comes in handy because it made me a formidable rival for that creepy little brat Tazmin Burvile (who is already pretty cat-like).
• The sixth one I recall is where our friend the Master Of Oz falls into the sea and becomes some sort of fishman after fusing his dna with that of our old pet fish Triton. He calls himself the Incredible Mr Ozward- it's a reference to the 1964 classic The Incredible Mr Limpet (there was going to be a remake of this movie with Jim Carrey in it, but sadly it never saw the light of day).
• This most recent one is where I fuse my dna with that of the grinch (it takes place at Universal Orlando during grinchmas) and become part grinch- pretty much becoming more grinch-like and resembling Jim Carrey's version of the grinch except for a few differences one of which being that I don't have the terrible termite infested smile (I have vampire teeth instead) or the Sean Connery accent and with quite long hair and black claws on my fingers and toes(the grinch has them in the film except you can't see them too well).